i was at the toy store today, picking up my son's xmas gift. i went past the "little mommy" series of toys, and realised, suddenly, that there are no "little daddy" toys anywhere. We inculcate nurturing in the play of our girl children - across the world. But not in the play of our male children.
In that, we assume that male children do not have a "need to nurture". The need to love is as natural as the need to be loved. The need to nurture is as natural as the need to be nurtured.
At night, as my son sacrifices his play time to "put me to sleep" - patiently lying down and waiting for mater to relax, i wonder whether that assumption is true.
The need to nurture exists in everyone, and to tell a child that his need to nurture needs to be left unacknowledged, and, worse still, needs to be denied, is doing something very wrong for our male children.
We tell our male children that their only needs are need to win, need to conquer, and need to race. These needs we acknowledge in the toys of our children - racing tracks, ninja swords, aeroplanes. But the need to love and nurture.. the need to play "little daddy" - where did that go? Why do we laugh at sons and boys who even EXPRESS that need, in the form of a hug or caring for a younger child, et al? But are perfectly comfortable with a girl child who displays nurturing behavior? Hell's bells, we even encourage it.
So, what kind of hypocrisy makes us deny a basic need in our male children, while accepting and applauding the same need in our girl children?
Has anyone wondered, the difference it would make, if boys played "little daddy"s in their growing up?
In that, we assume that male children do not have a "need to nurture". The need to love is as natural as the need to be loved. The need to nurture is as natural as the need to be nurtured.
At night, as my son sacrifices his play time to "put me to sleep" - patiently lying down and waiting for mater to relax, i wonder whether that assumption is true.
The need to nurture exists in everyone, and to tell a child that his need to nurture needs to be left unacknowledged, and, worse still, needs to be denied, is doing something very wrong for our male children.
We tell our male children that their only needs are need to win, need to conquer, and need to race. These needs we acknowledge in the toys of our children - racing tracks, ninja swords, aeroplanes. But the need to love and nurture.. the need to play "little daddy" - where did that go? Why do we laugh at sons and boys who even EXPRESS that need, in the form of a hug or caring for a younger child, et al? But are perfectly comfortable with a girl child who displays nurturing behavior? Hell's bells, we even encourage it.
So, what kind of hypocrisy makes us deny a basic need in our male children, while accepting and applauding the same need in our girl children?
Has anyone wondered, the difference it would make, if boys played "little daddy"s in their growing up?
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